Consu Tolosa
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Facing Reluctance; Facing Fear

2/4/2013

1 Comment

 
Picture
The proposition alone triggers a wave of jitters: become a full-time artist.  

Is that what I really want? Can I really leave my clients, the built-in accountability of having a schedule, the depth of sharing, the role of guide and supporter? ... Or it is what I want... I am just afraid I can't pull it off?

2013 is my lab. My number one task is to TRY THINGS OUT. When I am reluctant to do something my gut is telling me to try; I negotiate. 'Do it for 15 minutes.' 'Just start.' 'Do it first.' Reluctantly sometimes, I engage... and frequently I am amazed at the results: it gets done. It's no big deal. And even if it is not really something I want to do again, it's still No Big Deal.

So the take-away for this quest to overcome reluctance and face my fears is to keep moving, to be kind and compassionate towards myself, but to push in the direction of the question, which might just be the direction of the dream.

1 Comment
Laura link
3/16/2013 03:03:31 pm

It feels so good to NOT be alone in these feelings. Tricia and I just took a trip to learn from Donna Downey and for the entire drive we talked about fear and why we don't do what we think we want to do. I kept telling her that Consu said just create and the rest will work itself out. I am not near the artist you are but I long to make my living creating. I'm excited to follow you on this blog, your work needs to be seen by others!!!

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